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An Old Drunk

Guest thrasher

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Guest thrasher

An old drunk staggered through the bar, bumping into tables and


knocking drinks all over the place until the barman emerged to give him the old




"Hang on mate," slurred the drunk, "I jus' wanna go ter th' toilet..."


The barman, being a bit of an old softie like most barmen in this


wicked world, gave the drunk a swift clip around the ear and shoved him in the


direction of the gents.


"Do what you have to do, and get out of here!" he snarled.


The drunk staggered through the door of the gents and the barman


returned to the bar and got on with his job of dispensing good cheer and


short-changing the punters.


About ten minutes or so later, the entire bar fell silent as a strange,


high-pitched wailing sound echoed round the room.


Real eerie, it was.


A short while later the sound was repeated. And again. It was a weird,


unearthly noise that seemed to be coming from the toilets.


The barman, suddenly remembering the old drunk, rushed off to




He flung open the door. "What the hell's going on?" he shouted. "I told


you to do what you had to do, then get out of here!"


The drunk wailed again, an eerie, high-pitched sound that made the


hairs on the back of the barman's neck stand on end.


"Strewth! Will ya shut that row?" the barman demanded. "You're scaring


the customers! Stop that row and get out!"


The drunk looked up from where he was sitting, a pained expression on


his face.


"I'm trying to, mate. I'm trying to," he gasped. "But every time I step


on the pedal to flush this thing, there's something that grabs me by the




"You dumb bastard!" shouted the barman. "You're sitting on the bloody


mop bucket!"



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