Guest john Posted June 25, 2014 Share Posted June 25, 2014 Edith, was an old widowed pensioner who lived alone. She was having problems at her rear end & after consulting her local Doctor, the Doctor told her he needed to have more accurate technical information about her particular issue. He therefore instructed her to purchase a rectal thermometer at the local Chemist shop, & after a taking daily temperatures from the rear passage & recorded with the thermometer she was to bring these values back to the Doctor for further diagnosis. She therefore went to the local Chemist & asked for a rectal thermometer which her Doctor had told her to buy. The Chemist located this item from off the shelf & started to wrap it up, when Edith asked the Chemist if he could give her some advise. The Chemist said "what would you like to know", & Edith replied, "Could you please show me how to use this device?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PA. Posted June 25, 2014 Share Posted June 25, 2014 Anyway she took it home and put the rectal thermometer in her back passage and recorded the temperatures. After a week she took her recordings back to the Doctor who was stunned by the numbers. She said for all the good those numbers were she may as well stuck it up her bum. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bexrbetter Posted June 25, 2014 Share Posted June 25, 2014 Later that day the Chemist reached for his pen tucked behind his ear only to find a rectal thermometer upon which he remarked "Some bum has stolen my pen ...." 2 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marty_d Posted June 25, 2014 Share Posted June 25, 2014 This site really is the suppository of all knowledge! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deskpilot Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 But it sometimes give me the shits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
facthunter Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 Like the Italian lady down the street who said" For all the good the pill is a doin my daughter she might as a well a be eatin it". Nev 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pmccarthy Posted June 26, 2014 Share Posted June 26, 2014 The pill was too big to swallow, she was meant to hold it between her knees. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deskpilot Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 The pill was too big to swallow, she was meant to hold it between her knees. If she's on her hands and knees, it still isn't going to work is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marty_d Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 If she's on her hands and knees, it still isn't going to work is it? That reminds me of the naughty version of Old Mother Hubbard... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PA. Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 I asked a priest one day if it was ok to sleep with a woman who is not my wife, he said "Yes, as long as that is all you do." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marty_d Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 I asked a priest one day if it was ok to sleep with a woman who is not my wife, he said "Yes, as long as that is all you do." Why would you ask someone who's not supposed to sleep with anyone?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PA. Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Why would you ask someone who's not supposed to sleep with anyone?? So said the choir boy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pmccarthy Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Deskpilot, post: 433859, member: 64"]If she's on her hands and knees, it still isn't going to work is it? Not if she is doggedly determined to do it anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmick Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 She could use a two pronged rectal thermometer to bridge the gap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ayavner Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Oh crap, i thought that was for the BBQ... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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