Investment Advice.

[Yenn]

Investment tips for 2008

 

With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and Acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks.

 

Watch for these consolidations later this year:

 

1) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. Will merge

 

and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

 

 

2) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces

 

and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.

 

 

 

3) 3M will merge with Goodyear

 

and become: MMMGood.

 

 

4) Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge

 

and become: ZipAudiDoDa .

 

 

 

5) FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS,

 

and become: FedUP.

 

 

 

6) Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers

 

will become: Fairwell Honeychild.

 

 

 

7) Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected

 

to become: Poupon Pants.

 

 

8) Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women

 

will become: Knott NOW!

 

 

 

And finally...

 

 

 

9) Victoria's Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge

 

under the new name: TittyTittyBangBang

 

 

[facthunter]

Surprising.

 

Bit up front for an old bugger Ian. I am very impressed. Nev

 

 

[Guest High Plains Drifter]

Hmmm, I've seen this before somewhere