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The only cow

Old Koreelah

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The only cow in a small town in Ireland stopped giving milk.




The town folk found they could buy a cow in Scotland quite cheaply. They brought the cow from Scotland . It was wonderful, produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.




They bought a bull to mate with the cow to get more cows, so they'd never have to worry about their milk supply again.




They put the bull in the pasture with the cow but whenever the bull tried to mount the cow, the cow would move away.


No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull and he was never able to do the deed.




The people were very upset and decided to go to the Vet, who was very wise, tell him what was happening and ask his advice.




"Whenever the bull tries to mount our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward. When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. If he attempts from the one side, she walks away to the other side."




The Vet rubbed his chin thoughtfully and pondered this before asking, "Did you by chance, buy this cow in Scotland ?"




The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned that they had brought the cow over from Scotland . "You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow from Scotland ?




The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye:


"My wife is from Scotland ."



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And another great cow story










Julia Gillard touring the countryside in a chauffeur-driven car.




Suddenly, a cow jumps out onto the road, they hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.




Julia in her usual charming manner, says to the chauffeur:




'You get out and check - you were driving. '




The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.




'You were driving; go and tell the farmer, ' says Julia.




Five hours later, the chauffeur returns totally plastered, hair ruffled with a big grin on his face.




'My god, what happened to you? 'asks Julia.




The chauffeur replies: ' When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of malt whisky, the wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me. '




'What on earth did you say? 'asks Julia.




'I knocked on the door, and when it was answered, I said to them:




'I'm Julia Gillard's chauffeur and I've just killed the cow.'



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