In an outback bar...

[nomadpete]

A Drover walks into a bar with

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A pet crocodile by his side.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He puts the crocodile up on the bar.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He turns to the astonished patrons.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

'I'll make you a deal. I'll open this crocodile's mouth and place my manhood inside.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then the croc will close his

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mouth for one minute.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

'Then he'll open his mouth

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And I'll remove my unit unscathed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In return for witnessing this

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Spectacle,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Each of you will buy me a drink.'

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The crowd murmured their approval.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The man stood up on the bar,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dropped his trousers,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And placed his Credentials and related parts in the crocodile's open mouth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The croc closed his mouth

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As the crowd gasped.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After a minute,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The man grabbed a beer

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bottle and smacked the

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Crocodile really,really hard on the top of

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Its head

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The croc opened his mouth

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The crowd cheered,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And the first of his free

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Drinks were delivered.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The man stood up again and made another offer. 'I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try.'

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A blonde woman timidly

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Spoke up..........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

'I'll try it -

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just don't hit me so hard

 

 

 

 

 

 

With the beer bottle!'

 

 

[Sapphire]

Just as well the local butcher didn't put his hand up.

 

Saw a game show and the host make some sexual joke to the good looking female contestant. Her face lit up and said yes. He spent the next half minute in front cameras and audience explaining it was only a joke. No more jokes like that from him.