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The coach of Collingwood Football Club gets wind of a potential new young recruit who lives in Afghanistan. He and the Magpie Recruiting Manager thumb a lift with the RAAF to the war torn country and track the young man down.


Risking life and limb dodging bombs, bullets, RPGs and grenades they finally find the lad and convince him to come to Australia.



The boy does a full pre-season, plays all the practice matches and gets picked for the senior's bench for the first game of the year. Ten minutes into the first quarter, the centre half forward goes down with a severe knee injury. The coach turns to the young lad and says, “This is it son, take the centre half forward position and show us what you can do!” The lad takes to the field and plays the greatest debut game in AFL history. He kicks 9 goals, takes the mark of the year and kicks the winning goal after the siren from outside 50.



The Pies chair him off the ground and give him three cheers. Back in the dressing room, the Coach tells the rest of the team what the young Taliban boy has been through and that he is a model for all youth in Melbourne. He then pulled the boy aside and tells him to ring his mother and tell her what he did today.



The boy phones his mother and says, “Mum! Guess what I did today!” “I don't care what you did today,” said his mother, “I'll tell YOU what happened here today while you were out wasting time! - Your Dad was stabbed and robbed, the house was torched, our car blown up, your sister attacked and your brother abducted!”



”By the beard of the prophet mother', said the boy, “I feel a bit responsible for what happened in my absence.” His mother replied before slamming the phone down, “So you should be!.......If it wasn't for you, we would never have moved to Collingwood in the first place!”





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Guest pelorus32

Now leave us alone...before I moved to Collingwood a bloke said to me "where are you going to shift to?" "Collingwood" I said. He looked aghast and said "you can't go there, all it is is tarts and drugs!!" then he looked thoughtful and said "and the best butcher's shop in Melbourne".


So as well as the best team in Melbourne (silence in the cheap seats - it's true) we also have the best butcher's shop...and Chopper Read.







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