SEX FOR CA$H ? ?

[Phil Perry]

On their wedding night, the young bride

 

Approached her new husband and asked

 

For $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter.

 

In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.

 

 

 

This scenario was repeated each time they made

 

love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a

 

cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

 

Arriving home around noon one day, she was

 

surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.

 

During the next few minutes, he explained that

 

his employer was going through a process of corporate

 

downsizing, and he had been let go.

 

It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find

 

another position that paid anywhere near what

 

he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

 

 

 

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which

 

showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling

 

nearly $1 million.

 

 

 

Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the

 

bank which were worth over $2 million,

 

and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank.

 

She explained that for more than

 

three decades she had 'charged' him for sex,

 

these holdings had multiplied and these were the

 

results of her savings and investments.

 

Faced with evidence of cash and investments

 

worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could

 

barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,

 

 

 

'If I'd had any idea what you were doing,

 

I would have given you all my business!'

 

That's when she shot him.

 

Women are like phones:

 

They like to be held, talked to, and touched often but push the wrong button,

 

and you’re disconnected!

 

 

[Robbo]

On their wedding night, the young bride

Approached her new husband and asked

 

For $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter.

 

In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.

 

 

 

This scenario was repeated each time they made

 

love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a

 

cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

 

Arriving home around noon one day, she was

 

surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.

 

During the next few minutes, he explained that

 

his employer was going through a process of corporate

 

downsizing, and he had been let go.

 

It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find

 

another position that paid anywhere near what

 

he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

 

 

 

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which

 

showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling

 

nearly $1 million.

 

 

 

Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the

 

bank which were worth over $2 million,

 

and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank.

 

She explained that for more than

 

three decades she had 'charged' him for sex,

 

these holdings had multiplied and these were the

 

results of her savings and investments.

 

Faced with evidence of cash and investments

 

worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could

 

barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,

 

 

 

'If I'd had any idea what you were doing,

 

I would have given you all my business!'

 

That's when she shot him.

 

Women are like phones:

 

They like to be held, talked to, and touched often but push the wrong button,

 

and you’re disconnected!

Jeez Phil, I read the topic heading and Though tonight was my lucky night.

Then I thought, hope the females don't pay per second or im going to only make cents!

 

Reminds me "of a mate" who visited certain establishments, he asked if they do per second billing and if he could get a tax invoice!

 

 

[Phil Perry]

Rather like when I was younger and had many girlfriends. . . .

 

When I phoned them it was usually $2.95 per minute (charges may vary )

 

 

[Robbo]

Rather like when I was younger and had many girlfriends. . . .When I phoned them it was usually $2.95 per minute (charges may vary )

Jeez you got a bargain i was on like five bucks.

 

 

[bexrbetter]

When I phoned them it was usually $2.95 per minute (charges may vary )

 

Jeez you got a bargain i was on like five bucks.

You got to be careful with STD, can end up embarrassingly expensive.

 

 

[Phil Perry]

Bex. . .have you explained to the Ozzies that STD meant Subscriber Trunk Dialling in the UK ?

 

Perhaps you had this in the colonies as well. . .( ! )

 

 

[Cosmick]

Bex. . .have you explained to the Ozzies that STD meant Subscriber Trunk Dialling in the UK ?Perhaps you had this in the colonies as well. . .( ! )

Is that dialing with 'No Hands'

 

 

[bexrbetter]

Perhaps you had this in the colonies as well. . .( ! )

Yup, STDs were common in Australia.

 

 

[Marty_d]

Is that dialing with 'No Hands'

I hope you're talking about a push button phone and not the old rotary dial...