Jump to content

The Never Ending Story


Admin

Recommended Posts

...the loser has to write two thread extensions at once Bob

...in full swing since Rat had earlier spiked the punch. "Waddaya reckon Ben?" asked Madge Jayco, "the lightwing flicks hard to the left, can we only do left rolls?" Ben tried to snort derisively, but snotted instead. "Pitts pilots don't know their left from their right anyway!" he asserted, then blushed inexplicably. Suddenly....

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

.the tent next to where they were judging "best board member outfit" behind "the hop skip and jump competition" which was in full swing since.........Ben had let off a can of "start ya bastard" in the men's room. At that point, the Rat dropped one paw on Maggot's shoulder and rasped, "let's see your ASIC, buddy!".

Great Wall looked up from Hy's recumbent body, and screamed, "his warranty is void, you PLICK!"; but Maggot didn't hear, as he staggered back in shock and replied reflexively, "I may have left it in my flight bag...". Ratso moved fowards ominously, being careful to keep his arse in the shade...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

...in full swing since Rat had earlier spiked the punch. "Waddaya reckon Ben?" asked Madge Jayco, "the lightwing flicks hard to the left, can we only do left rolls?" Ben tried to snort derisively, but snotted instead. "Pitts pilots don't know their left from their right anyway!" he asserted, then blushed inexplicably. Suddenly....

Tubbso burst through the tent flap, and yelled "April fools! Show us yer ASIC!". Ben felled him with a right cross...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great Wall looked up from Hy's recumbent body, and screamed, "his warranty is void, you PLICK!"; but Maggot didn't hear, as he staggered back in shock and replied reflexively, "I may have left it in my flight bag...". Ratso moved fowards ominously, being careful to keep his **** in the shade...

and said, "that's too bad... buddy...", when Maggot heard Tubbso's cry from the nearby tent. He kicked at where Ratso's groin should have been, and shouted "April fool!".

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tubbso burst through the tent flap, and yelled "April fools! Show us yer ASIC!". Ben felled him with a right cross...

...and then fell through the side of the tent, did a commando roll, and jumped to his feet - right in front of Maggot, who...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

....and also at the prolific writing of Bobby who had gathered momentum, but was now walking carefully back through the long grass to get behind the Japanese, who by now had brought out their white Kamikaze head bands with the red spot representing shed blood.

 

On a visit to Japan, Turbo had been awarded one of these in return for being able to point out the difference between the left mudguard of a truck and its exhaust stack.

 

When Turbo asked what the writing said, he was assured it read "Honourable Turbo brave truck warrior", but years later a visiting Japanese woman got the giggles up and explained that it said "Shortest in Town"

 

Turbo gave it to Ratso in return for a discount of $3.00 when he stayed at the Rathaus.

 

The blood of the warriors' grandsons was up by now and Honda San reverently handed round the Saki and said "We will do what we can to avenge honourable ancestors even though outnumbered by Australian fryers."

 

"What you talking about iriot" said Yamaha San, "we outnumber THEM - only 17 Ratfry attendees this year"

 

"What will we do then?" asked Matsuda San "..........."

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

...."What will we do then?" asked Matsuda San "..........."

And a new voice spoke up, clearly and decisively from the back of the camp.

 

 

 

"We will take off before dawn, assemble at 15,000 ft over Cootamundla, tlack in via Hardy Forry Rake, Young, Warrendbean, Stockenbingal (so don't have a plang there) & Splingdale in a srow dive and allive into Temola out of the Sun" said Cam.

 

 

 

"Who are you mate?" asked Nobu "As I only have an RAA Certificate so no frying before the sun comes up and 15,000 is a bit high for my Thluster."

 

 

 

"I am Cameron Ian Kazi II, you will do what you are told in your lag and tube thingy, and I will read you all to a rong overdue victoly over the white-eyes."

 

 

 

"Are you lelated to the broke who luns Afghanistan?" added Nobu.

 

 

 

"No you dill" leplied Cam "Not Karzai ........ KAZI ......... (what a dlongo you are, Knob-boy) and it was my dad who red the attacks on the Calliers."

 

 

 

"Oh poop, and so solly" leplied the Knobu, defelentially, "That Cam I Kazi, who was ..............

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"........from Moluya and walked around all day with an Iphone, Ipad, Iteeth, Iscream and Ipatch?""He good at finger pushing, but will he......................"

...... cut the mustard at the CWA" asked Nanna, who loved a good finger pushing, particularly when there was danger of a pre-dawn attack and she was desperate for a ..........

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

........straffing, if not a bombing - she wasn't fussy.

 

but old Nobu was having none of this, "We must be professional", he said, "work as team, fry accuraterary"

 

"How we do that with one Gulfstream" asked Simon Datsun-Dunlop who had just arrived, and was a vague type of person, all over the road, and.......

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

........... he was tired.

 

 

 

"Are you lerated to Weary Dunrop?" asked the Knob who knew he may be pushing the boundalies on Anzac Day, but he plessed on legardress.

 

 

 

Simon thought for a while and lepried "..............

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

" No, I'm a produt of the tyre industry actually following a visit by Takajima Datsun to the Dunlop Tyre Company on Dorking, Dorkshire, England.

 

He was looking for a tyre company, and my mother was looking for company, and.................."

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

... as a result, the boys and girls at my boys school called me a Taki Dork."

 

 

 

"Don't speak to his type" advised Ben, who had forgotten that he was owned by the VW boys von Dresden "And vot iss wrong mit zat?" he added.

 

 

 

"Was you mother happy?" Mitch asked Simon.

 

 

 

"Well ........ at first she was because she was desperate (as she had been without it for about 30 years and was even considering CWA membership), but then she became aware of his ...............

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

........ become well known as the best finger painter in Europe, although notoriously unreliable (and his creations had terrible resale value).

 

 

 

"Why would she hitch up with a mug like Pete Reno?" asked Mitch.

 

 

 

"Well, he seduced her by painting her finger and while it was drying he slipped his .............

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

........ become well known as the best finger painter in Europe, although notoriously unreliable (and his creations had terrible resale value). 

 

"Why would she hitch up with a mug like Pete Reno?" asked Mitch.

 

 

 

"Well, he seduced her by painting her finger and while it was drying he slipped his .............

...arrack into her rose, and after that she didn't remember much... "HAY!" yelled Simon Datsun-Dunlop, "what's that plick in tight shorts doing to the Gulfstleam???". All eyes turned towards the patch of darkness he was pointing to, before Ssan Yong said "you really past it, Gulfstleam THERE", pointing at the taxying Gulfstream...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

................from the pilot's open window could just been seen some little nose hairs and a gleaming gold tooth, and there was a pungent odour of stale urine trailing the aircraft. Rattus with his usual smug look settle back in his seat and said: "Now where do I need to start avoiding Radar to get to Diego Garcia, and................"

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

................from the pilot's open window could just been seen some little nose hairs and a gleaming gold tooth, and there was a pungent odour of stale urine trailing the aircraft. Rattus with his usual smug look settle back in his seat and said: "Now where do I need to start avoiding Radar to get to Diego Garcia, and................"

...how the smell am I going to take off without runway lights?" Meantimes, the plick in tight shorts...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Andys@coffs

jumped on board and did his 10 sec pre take off checks not knowing that the Japanese clans had all bolted to the end of the strip and carefully erected a Ferris wheel smack bang in the splay and place naked woman with clown hair and hats at intervals along the strip knowing that the likelihood of Madge, who was in the left hand seat of the gulfstream, seeing the Ferris wheel in time was practically zero once he had cottoned on to the fact that there were bare boobys in plain site..........

 

But, he hadn't counted on the F'nq cowboy attitude where Madge was hear to say half way down the strip and 4 separate boob sets behind "Hold my beer for me and watch this...." as he drove the throttles right to the gate and stood the Gulfstream on its tail and climbed vertically never seeing the trap that had been laid for him.......

 

Suzi San was P'd....Its in the splay! how he miss??? he questioned.........The rest of the Japanese were mightily unimpressed, from a bunch of scaffolding pipes to a full working Ferris wheel in the time it took Madge to appear to do his full checklist was no mean feat and besides.....

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

..........Handles had been seen slipping into the co pilot's seat. It was rumoured that handles had received a phone call from a Kings Cross hooker five minutes before takeoff, and it was feared this might be a hijacking (or in Madge's case a Lojacking), however Sydney police had cleared things up saying that the lady had simply phone Handles to say he had left his wallet behind. Others spoke of the haphazard way he flew his Jab, quite frequently mistaking control inputs when he accidentally thought he was in his trike.

 

Geoff Thomas, Australia's Own Expert on aviation said this was a common thing where pilots had flown more than one plane. "When the fly one machine he said, sometimes they don't fly it"

 

Angry Useton (Ret. and feeding off our taxes) thanked Mr Thomas for this very useful information and said "............"

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Andys@coffs

whew!!! I thought back in post 8869 that Rat was the PIC....but no....it was the plick that was the PIC and Rat, for a moment was merely drapped over his shoulder....it was said that Rat could smell boobs for miles .......

 

Suzi San said "Yes and as for the splay....that's what we did wong, we didn't get on our knees and splay that madge hit the Ferrit Wheel....."

 

Which of cause confused Angry......."Whats that got to do with pink bats?????" he asked

 

Turdy suggested "you doppey plick! Not everything is to do with Bats in space!"

 

and Angry just got moreso! "Wasn't the plick the PIC???".

 

Ma Hindra was over it in a big way.....Get your arses over here and lets get a fish head curry with roti or 2 under your belt it will all become clearer then when.......

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

........... it was suddenly apparent that the crowd sitting around the BBQ (and also those in the bushes trying to crack on to Nanna, Mavis & Ma H ........ [but as we all know, what goes on at a Fly-In stays at the Fly-In so that is a matter for another Thread or Charge-Sheet]) located to the west of the strip, was twice the size of the crowd that attended Natfly.

 

 

 

"Latfry is more popurar that Natfly" said Aki, feeling preased with his crever use of ranguage.

 

 

 

"There are no rats in my dinner" responded Ma Hindra indignantly "And it's not a fry, its a fish-head cully stew."

 

 

 

Aki then turned to Turdy and commented "Isn't it good to have Lob Rrewerryn contlibuting to the NES, although he does use up a rot of the day's quota of L's (and R's).

 

 

 

"Yeah Aki, but at least he isn't ............

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...