Captain
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Everything posted by Captain
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Explanatory Note: The use of the term "skid-mark" in the above note does not refer to what Turbo does in the 'Vette each Friday night while cruising Lygon St. It refers to the Greenies that bull so despises, in the context of bull believing that the Greenies are a "skid-mark" on the underpants of Aussie society.
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..... and swamped their kayaks that were made from hemp, coke bottles and used nappies. It was bull's cray boat, so ever the professional skipper, and despite it being against his very nature, bull stopped the boat and picked up the soaked "skid-mark" of Greenies. (A "skid-mark" being the correct and appropriate collective noun for a group of feral Greenies). "Give them a feed Marky" said bull, who had Marky Mark rostered on as his 2nd mate for this trip (many people think that bull does not have any mates, but the normal on-board Cray Boat hierarchy has solved that). Then bull continued "They can kip in the galley, but if Sarah H-Y is one of them, take her to my cabin, tell her to have a tub, and I'll be there soon to .....
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Side explanatory Note .... bull being by far the most attractive of the 4 present NES contributors, and the same even when CT is in da house. It is undeniable that our bull has a mystical yet earthy mix of Qld and Tazzy animal & crustaceanal magnetism about him.
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...... a "Lady" again, unless I am wearing my makeup and that little taffeta number, with full accessories, that I like so much." The old bloke (Cappy and Turboref) was shocked at being cane-less (who would ever break a blind bloke's white cane? Well bull would, as reported by OT), but he was also a bit keen to witness (he would have to feel his way ... NTTIAWWT) bull all kitted out in taffeta, with gloves, high heels and a handbag, so he whispered to bull ".......
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..... gentleman, who was blind, came up to captain bull, tapped bull with his cane and said "Good day ladies". Our bull, not wishing to cause embarrassment, went ......
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.... the other reason that upgrades no longer happen is that the upgraded plebs (ordinary.economyclass.folkref ..... like Cappy and Planey) will, in their upgraded enraptured excitement, often sit in the wrong seats and therefore trap the bona fide business class crayfish within the crack in their .......
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..... realized that he loved the swashbuckling cray fisherman's life, he respected Captain bull (our bull, not the other Bull), Marky M soon had a lover in every port, same like bull does (and some WERE the same .... which is called being sharing and caring in the maritime lexicon) and M'yM used his outstanding previous political skills (well, "outstanding" in the tiny cesspool that is WA politics) to ......
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...... latte, me Cray Industry equivalent of a Gumment pension, and me own Personal Assistant?" bull, who also wanted a Personal Assistant to clean out his pipes during lonely nights at sea, replied ".......
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..... the phone to call the General Manager of his Cray Fishing Operation (CFO [avref]), Marky Mark, who Onesie had been able to pick up on the cheap from Centrelink. "Hey Marky, old mate, how are they hang'n?" Onesie always liked to bond with his staff by talking down at their level, and he ....... Marky and his kiss-curl, plus his bored 1000 yard stare that working with OT often engenders.
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..... Turbo, who has never been known to apologise or regret anything in his life (which has been of considerable duration), decided that he needed to .....
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.... strike her in that special vulnerable spot on the side of her temple (I am told that you could clearly hear the bones shattering) where David pinged Goliath (ref 1 Samuel 17) with his rock. Turbinia went down like a .........
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AN ASIDE TO DEAR BULL .... Let it go mate. OT has massive power, not only within the NES but on the entire Wreck Frying site ...... as I have discovered several times to my cost. Plus, and in addition, WA people can be vicious when slighted. Let it go, it is just not worth the cost, and while not wishing to be specific, have you noticed recently how OT has got rid of both CT and Planey.
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..... (not OUR beloved Captain) responded that "Yes, they are fairly similar, except that one used to be run by a horse headed cocaine sniffer and the other has a Senator that is more like the other end of the horse." He then continued on by saying "Listen mon Premiere Officer, just remember that as flight crew provided by Airbus, we are supplied by the European equivalent of the TSAPS group, which is run by Turbinia, who had been sent to Europe after that terribly embarrasing indiscretion in Canberra, and who is now having a torid affair with the head of the European Union and also with the wife of the boss of France (Turbinia has shown that she must be AC/DC/BC/FC/GC and every other C .... NTTIAWWT) ...... so as well as being kept pretty busy, Turbinia also has to ..........
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..... Captain became slightly aroused, and the FO then said "I know that we are over the South Island, but even here, is a XXXX like him aloud to say on the radio, for all to hear, that we XXXX our grandmothers and that ......
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..... that said "Hey, g'day to the AUF dude that is flying in Class D, as usual, at 45 knots ..... if you don't bugger off we will have ASIO exercise their carroting discretion once you land, and then we will have CASA take that carrot and use it to ......
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..... more senior public servants. ASIO were then asked by the Five Eyes to explain their carrotting techniques, which of course starts with growing very long carrots, concealing them within special pouches in the ASIO operator's clothes, making them easily accessible once the operator is up behind the target individual, and then for the carrot to be strong enough when wrapped around the target's neck and pulled tight using the wooden handles that are molded into the carrot. The technique is slower than using wire, but softer on the neck (just consider the result when tested on Jeffrey Epstein), and the operative can have a carrot dinner afterwards to get rid of the evidence. As an option, the ASIO Field manual shows how the carrot can also be used effectively by inserting it into .....
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.... , However, Turbine's Shiny Arse'd Public Servants P/L were now supplying most Public Servants under contract to the Gubbmint, and there was therefore a clash of interest within the NES. Onesie and Cappy were divided, but after their 3-hour Zoom (avref) hookup (Gliding avref) to discuss the issues, they decided to back ......
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..... attempt to, eventually, steer the NES back to matters aviation. "Now, hang on there, let's not go too far" was the reply (or words to that effect) from ......
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In light of the recent Zuckerberg admissions, Wreck Flying have come clean and have now admitted to suppressing the use & dosage levels of Castrol R in Blue Head engines, and that the last Board Elections were interfered with by the Turbinebook organisation. Will the NES recover from these bitter blows?
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..... criticise bull's rebellious movement. bull did make a couple of errors early on, as all members were required to have a "Don't Step on Me" tattoo and also the logo on the empennage of their aircraft. As we all know, bull is very polite and there was a bit of a mixup when he asked his VP to arrange the logo, so instead of a rattler with the words emblazened, they had 5000 stickers and 2000 members with the below tattoo. The organisation ......
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ESTEAMED COLLEAGUES. I also agree with the inplementation of a "Monitor & Watch" status on Turbo's membership, as he has always been a bit of a worry, even when he was not so forgetful. MODERATOR 3
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DEAR COLLEAGUE. I and the rest of the Wreck Flying Management Team agree that this is of substantial concern, as the TDOTC is one of the TurgidPlonker's own organisations. We therefore suggest that we change his membership status to "Monitor and Watch" in order to see if he has any other "difficulties" that might need sanction. Sincerely MODERATOR 6.
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DEAR TURBOPLANNER. We appreciate that you may find it difficult, however it is one of the unique features of Wreck Flying that members can scroll back through, or to, previous posts within a thread to check what was advised, and in your case,the meaning of TDOTC. We hope that you find this advice to be helpful and that it adds to your enjoyment of our site. Sincerely MODERATOR 8.
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.... as Turdboy was able to arrange a short term lease for all of the weapons, and ammo, to the Melbourne crime gangs, on condition that he has exclusive rights to produce the resultant version of Underbelly ..... plus a holiday in Fiji with Lawyer X. This meant that the TDOTC would ......
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.... fact that they would all bugger off in various rag and tube contraptions to get there $100 hamburger (avref) every Saturday or Sunday, and they would all take their weapons with them to pot some bunnies, or anything else that moved, the aerial (avref) way. The issue with this was that all of the TDOTC weapons were made from cheap Chinese 5-ply, and the trainees didn't yet realize that yelling "BANG" wasn't actually firing the gun. So the bunnies, cats, grunters and deer all messed themselves laughing when buzzed by a Drifter with the pilot yelling "BANG" several times, or calling "RAT A TAT TAT" if he had shifted the weapon to full auto. Some pilots even showed their inexperience with these 5-ply rifles by shooting holes in their Drifter skins. But what was Commandant Turdy to do next, as this mob certainly weren't ready for real weaponry, but always chasing a bargain, he had bought a few containers of US weapons from the Taliban for a good price and ......
