Captain

..... low paid, low quality. low rent trainee from Mackas. "Please wait in the drive thru bays and I'll get the order to you asap" said Sir Baanard (who knew all the lingo from the Boggabri Mackas when he would work late to save the license of an AUF member, and the Golden Arches crew would still be unable to get his order to him before he ......

.... Sir Baanard Turbine who was a Baarister (and Tyro owner) with chambers in Gunnedah and Boggabri (so he was in the big league), specializing in getting AUF type off charges that he considered were obviously ..........

G'day bull and glad to see that you can still walk. Is that the same coffee shop where all the sick people struggle down to get to, so that they can have a durry outside in the cold? (And perhaps even try to crack onto the sick lady also having a smoke?)

.....which caused consternation, and even worse, in the Namoi Valley town (& grass strip) of Baan Baa. "CASA are taking the p*ss" said the Prez of the Baan Baa International Flying Club "As they well know that .....

..... letters should only be written once a letter of approval was obtained from Canberra. Further, it was an edict that no letter should be written, considered or drafted without the full Paper Cut Safety Protocol (the PCSP) being put in place, as defined in the major OH&S Document, which nobody had actually seen in hard copy because of the paper cut danger (PCD) and even digital copies had a warning attached for Keyboard Fingertip Bruising (KFBs), Tablet RSI (TRSI) and smart (or dumb) phone brain injury risks (BIRs). This latter potential BIR injury has never actually been proven because the investigations (under the CASA ACT subclause 35,679.(B).56429,(d).12) of 5 subcommittees (5SCs) had stalled when trying to define a Male and Female Brain (M&FB), then to actually find an employee that was not on a sickie or stress leave, who could actually .........

...., so they pulled up outside the Tait Toyota dealership to have a typical CASA meeting. "Does anyone have any paper cuts or other personal safety concerns or examples of where you have been offended, that they wish to report?" asked the guy who had the seniority. Four hours later he moved on to agenda item 2. "Who wants to bend over first to have the PP spines pulled out of their clacker, but more importantly, surely there is somebody else that we can blame for this and who can we persecute to make us all feel better?" That is when the car washing bloke from Taits leant over the fence and said "...............

....... , dragged themselves up to their full height and yelled with a lithp "We are highly offended by what is being done with those Cacti and .......

... wasn't pretty, but a fair crowd turned up to ......

SIDE COMMENT - Which is a lot of guns for a short-arsed, overweight, obnoxious and opinionated CASA FOI (these are just the sort of people who would knock off grapes while alongside someone's deathbed .... or even when you have an ingrowing toenail), but it did boost their already inflated egos.

..... all said, in unison, "We love the Govt being involved in our lives, We stand with Dan/Albo/Vladimir/Xi/Edi/Adolph/Kim/Jacinda/Joe/Kamala/Penny/Chris/MarkyMark/The DweebWhoRunsTheGreens (Cross out those that do not apply) and give us free money)". When CASA saw this reaction, they decided that it was time to make their move to take over the supervision of Motor Vehicles generally nationwide and restructured their most obnoxious staff to be part of CASA MkII, as the acronym stands for Cars Attract Special Attention and ramp checks were implemented at every Servo, Home & stoplight ................. with imported red go-fast American sports cars receiving special vitriol. "Your street directory is out of date" was their favourite and attracted a $25 fine because it applied to 95% of the vehicles checked, and the public was so meek, particularly in Mextoria, that the CASA (MkII) people (sic) could be even more obnoxiousable, before ........

Disclaimer Explainer...... You have been conned mate. You are always given fruit when you are crook, and your family always scoff it down when you are asleep or unconscious. Family cannot be trusted on this issue.

....... who cooperated closely with a Farmer named Wes, and together they .........

.... Turbini you will always been a slippery customer. "I also learnt from bull, because a faked being crook and got heaps of sympathy and free fresh fruit" added Harry, or Hazza to his close mates. Harry, like his nephew Turdboy, also had an eye for the .......

...... as always, there was a 13 year window until the sky would fall in ..... or in this case the Island would flood. "Flood schmud" said Luigi "After all, watta ya gunna doo" so he used the poles to practice his footy with an intent to join the Freo Dockers or whatever rainbow serpent name they were using at the time ............ and if Freo itself wasn't inundated by rising sea levels. It is little known that the Turbini name is the Pacific Island is equivalent of the Rioli clan, with many generations of great football heritage. Tony Turbini had played with Hawthorn, Turbo Turbini hadn't made the team but still plays with himself, and Harry Turbini specialised in ............

...... as long as they crash (avref) very hard (groundref), the money is in the bank and the company is registered in the name of a bean-counter called Luigi Turbini on a small atoll in the south pacific (Turbo had been hoping that Global Warming would submerge the accountant's office ..... and the accountant) and has been doing his best, via burnouts in his Vette in Lygon St, to make it happen, however ......

..... and Elon relaxed because he thought that Turbo was referring to the old saying "You've been taking Coles to Newcastle", so he assumed that the normally blank look on Turbo's face was his usually unsuspicious, laid-back, Aussie attitude, but Elon had misjudged Turdboy (you don't get a Corvette and a bevy of aircraft by being a dill) who is actually as smart as a whip(pet) and intellectually well ahead of the game (Turdy had actually designed self-landing (avref) 1st stage boosters (sortofavref) and a Falcon 9 rocket back in 1974 but when he took the designs over the Florida (after 4 days living the high life at Disneyland [Turbo always fancied Mickey's chick, Minni and was out to "get" her ..... only to be disappointed when he went the grope and there was a 60 year old Mexican bloke inside the costume]), NASA looked at all of the designs and told Turdy to bite his .......

...... that I am the designer of the ISV, and you would be right, but do you also know that I invented and designed the IUD, and I am just the one to provide a personal fitting if you have the ........

....... a weight belt made from Tesla batteries. Then Elong, who was usually a bit slow and unable to develop new concepts, thought of a great business opportunity "I shall invite Turbine Fun Parks (Turbo is one of the few people whose intellect can keep up with mine) to install a new whiz-bang Park on the moon, specializing in Boinging and we will use the lack of gravity (avref) to make cash (necessaryforanavref) .... or as I so often put it scientifically "<G = $" and people will pay us a motza to boing from the Moon to Jupiter and then I'll charge them an exorbitant fee to bring them back in my new ........

........... the crusty old AUF types took a step back when Cirrus decided to flick their parachute system for a TASU under each new aircraft (avref). They had tested a TASU WITH the chute, but the S22 boinged up again into the chute, so efficiently thst it wrapped itself up like the metallic wrapper on a Wagga kabab, so the test pilot took a week to cut himself out. "We definitely prefer the TASU to the Chute as a solution" said the bloke from Cirrus, plus Elon Musk bought 2500 TASUs for use on the moon when he .......

... Oscar Pistorius springy legs, as that confuses the Kangaroo after you take it to dinner and ....... CAPPY, BEFORE HE GOT HIMSELF REALLY FIT, DOING HIS OSCAR MOVES WHILE TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM THE ROO, AFTER SHE HAD PAID FOR DINNER AND THE PLONK

..... a poor decrepit version of the diety around Denni that is your beloved Cappy. The previous marketing slogan for that area was 'Do It In Deni" and while Cappy is normally a modest type, he can confirm that he has, indeed, done it there. As for big bums, well, that is another story which involved numerous sheep, a fox, 3 Angus steers and a ...............

..... added an adlib into the routine that she entered the circuit crosswind at 350 ft (how was she to know that this was "the AUF rebels way of sticking it up the establishment"), the off-duty CASA dude in the audience jumped up and yelled ......

..... they would look at bull, some with disdain but every now and then one looked with passion. if you don't ask you dont know said bull "I like his understated manner and lack of capitals, plus his lack of punctilliation is a real turn-on" commented the Elle McPherson lookalike "It makes me go all gooy and I just want to "take" bull, in the nicest possible way, and .......

.......... Crappy also has a bevy of supermodels hanging off his arm, each anxious to be chosen as the next Mrs Crappy. (Truth be told, it was a session with a few supermodels (and I don't mean J230's on this occasion) that caused bull's turn, and to add insult to injury (well, a bit of a turn anyway) when bull spluttered a little, the models didn't even ..........

..... cut Turbo out of the deal and also to dump on bull (Onesie said that bull hasn't really been crook and he was just having a nice lie down because he is a bit slack), and what he said about that CT from DG is a scandal. But Crappy kept a calm demeanor and stayed loyal to his long-term great mate, Turdboy, bull from bone, that CT from DG and especially Planey (avref). Crappy's loyalty to his close mates is a thing of legend and something that Xi admired and wanted to leward by offering Clappy the fleedom (sic) of the City of Wuhan, free Pangorins for life and a host of other rurks & perks, starting with a gross of .......