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Puns for Educated Minds


Old Koreelah
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1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

 

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

 

3. She was only a whiskey maker but he loved her still.

 

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

 

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

 

 

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What's a pun?rgmwa

Almost a water craft. As in "Old mother ruddy cuddy had a rough cut punt, not a punt cut rough but a rough cut punt. You could play her like a fiddle and paddle up the middle in old mother ruddy cuddy's rough cut punt. Now say that 10 times accurately in 20 seconds.

Or

 

The pun, also called paronomasia, is a form of word play that suggests two or more meanings, by exploiting multiple meanings of words, or of similar-sounding words, for an intended humorous or rhetorical effect.

 

I like the first.

 

 

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I couldn't inflict all of them on you in one go...

 

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

 

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart

 

8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

 

9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

 

10.Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

 

11.Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

 

12.Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

 

13.I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

 

14.A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

 

15.The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

 

 

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