nomadpete

Maj, Where does Howie list the need for 1000hrly wing corrosion check? Peter

So true! but we each live in own delusion?

Thanks OME. it goes on the wall along with the other handy laminated lists.

GOOD GRIEF ! I recall almost buying a 42WLA some time ago, back in 1970 there was a chap in Sydney assembling them out of piles of ex army surplus stuff - he was charging quite a lot (abt $500) for a matt green pre-war 750 cc bike that my japanese 125 could outrun (and outstop). Don't I wish I had bought one and kept it in a shed for my superannuation package !

OMG What have I started? In order to balance things we must now post an equal number of threads that pay out on each and every other segment of the population. AND you will all have to attend the "Politically Correct" training module or else we'll start getting law suits. Time to start a new thread ........... But if it's clean AND politically correct, I don't think it belongs in the Laughter Forum. Dear Administrator, Please provide us with a new froum. Call it "Politically Correct Humour" - and put a counter on it so we can all see whether anybody bothers to read politically correct attempts at humour.

All disciplines of flying are good. The more variety you can experience, the more broard your knowledge of the air. And therefore the better equipped you are to bag out the 'other' kinds of flying. Started out with gliding but sadly have let it slide the past couple of yrs. I reckon stepping from my Lightwing into a 'proper' glider is like getting into a F1 racecar. Gliders are relatively such high performance aircraft. Anybody reading this, who hasn't yet gone gliding, should get out of their comfort zone (or armchair) and get out to their nearest gliding club. Be prepared for a relaxing and exciting day. Just don't expect to do a hit and run. Peter

BRIAN A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi, and the cabbie said, "Perfect timing. You're just like Brian" Passenger: "Who?" Cabbie: "Brian . He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happen like that to Brian , every single time." Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody." Cabbie: "Not Brian . He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy." Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special." Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Brian , he could do everything right." Passenger: "Wow. Some guy then." Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Brian, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Brian .." Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?" Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Brian. He died. I'm married to his effing widow."

HEY ! that's how I got to own an aircraft .........

A Pastor goes to the dentist for a set of false teeth. The first Sunday after he gets his new teeth, he talks for only eight minutes. The second Sunday, he talks for only ten minutes. The following Sunday, he talks for 2 hours and 48 minutes. The congregation had to mob him to get him down from the pulpit and they asked him what happened. The Pastor explains the first Sunday his gums hurt so bad he couldn't talk for more than 8 minutes. The second Sunday his gums hurt too much to talk for more than 10 minutes. But, the third Sunday, he put his wife's teeth in by mistake and he couldn't shut up... ((I KNOW you are smiling .....))

Maj, Would love to see a Lightwing register so that we can all share the joy, so to speak. BTW, My GA-912 has about 2200hrs on it, but is still awaiting my recovering of wings before I can get any more hours onto her. Have you checked your axle welds yet? I have not seen any AD on it but would definately have a close look before putting any more hours onto any Lightwing, as there have been a couple of second hand reports and one recent clear cut failure. (Pardon the pun.) Peter

We're still talking about pussycats, right? In a politically correct and undiscriminatory way, right?

No, No, a HIT is surely a nearly missed, and a near hit is a right hook. English grammar - she is a silly way to communicate. Anybody with enough time on their hands to contemplate the silliness of this grammar, are in desperate need of some flying to clear their heads.

Egad - they seem to be letting women do just about anything these days !

Where can I get stripes like that ?

Clearly this is classified information. For, if word got out, and the whole Santa / Xmas spending program got scrapped, the world economy would crash by the end of December.

Sorry - wrong forum. I was just a click away from the Aviation Laughter forum. Must have had too much Xmas cheer last night. I'm still crosseyed. Anyway, maybe this thread will benefit from something a little less sombre for a change.

I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends and colleagues, but it is difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on advice I wish to say the following : Please accept with no obligation , implied or implicit , my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the summer solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all . I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2012 , but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that Australia is necessarily greater than any other country ) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee . By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms : This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/ him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher . Best Regards ( without prejudice ) Name withheld ( Privacy Act ).

I know people like that...... come to think of it I AM a people like that.

Nah, not at all funny. Especially not funny if you replace the word "America" with "Australia" It is just an observation of facts that are freely available to everybody.

What a Brave man !! or just foolish......

I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets have a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost orgasmic from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I do for you in the Mall?" Apparently I'm not getting any tonight either.... but at least she knows I'm smarter than her.

Now this is pretty warped... A man was leaving a convenience store with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind the first. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking single file. The man couldn't stand his curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?" "My wife's." ''What happened to her?" The man replied, "My dog attacked and killed her." He inquired further, "But there's a second hearse." The man answered, "It's my mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife. when the dog turned on her too." A very poignant and touching moment of brotherhood and silence, passed between the two men. "Can I borrow the dog?" The man replied, "Get in line."

A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in Australia. ~~~ Well, there's a very simple answer. ~~~ Nobody bothered to check the oil. ~~~ We just didn't know we were getting low. ~~~ The reason for that is purely geographical. ~~~ Our OIL is located in ~~~ Bass Strait ~~~ East Queensland Shale Fields ~~~ Canning Basin ~~~ Perth Basin and North-West Continental Shelf ~~~ Our DIPSTICKS are located in Canberra!!!

The Australian Medical Association has weighed in on the new Prime Minister Julia Gillard's health care proposals. The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves. The Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve. The Obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception. Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted. Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while the Paediatricians said, "Oh, Grow up!" The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it. The Surgeons were fed up with the cuts and decided to wash their hands of the whole thing. The ENT specialists didn't swallow it, and just wouldn't hear of it. The Pharmacologists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow and the Plastic Surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter...." The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea. The Anaesthetists thought it was all a gas, but the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no. In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the a*holes in Canberra.

A 70 yr old man asks his wife "Do you feel sad when you see me running after young girls?" Wife replied, "No, not at all, even dogs chase cars they can't drive."