.........all jumped up and did a Haka, poking out their tongues and rolling their eyes, pathetic really, but it was authentic, they'd taken off their shoes and loosened their ties. What they didn't know was this was bindii country and immediately there were howls of pain.
From a distance the Australians didn't know this so they started doing the Ernie Dingo "Welcome to Country" where people stamp their feet and sniff smoke from the leaves dropped on a fire.
The Aussies only gave the ceremony passing seriousness and that's what saved them.
The Aussies stepped forward in time to Gough Whitlam's Anthem, being careful to get the word "girt" correct.
Thge New Zealanders had just exhausted all the bindii on their stamping ground when they were pushed back on to a new patch, and with loud howls they tried to out flank the Aussies, who by now had accidently set fire to the whole battleground.
It was NZer I'm Bob who ........