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The Never Ending Story


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35 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

...wrote on the Aerobatics thread that sometimes they did but this could be fixed by fitting a set of EGT gauges, and ................

..... by running them on Motul synthetic (as supplied by Trackbine Petroleum and Pharmaceuticals), so not just your normal Spanish Motul but super-refined by ..........

Edited by Captain
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..........running it through the chamois used to clean the plane.

There was general disagreement with this including a suggestion of adding alcohol, and ......

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.......various other unique additives - none of which, of course, were even remotely related to aviation lubricants. However, OT pointed out that there was another alternative - from Onetrak Oil Refining & Perfection Product Blending Corporation (OORPPBC), which was based just outside Kwinana, W.A., and which Corporation utilised discarded technology, knowledge and plant and equipment, from the recently-closed Kwinana BP Refinery - as well as the obsolete piping and tanks from said refinery, of course.

 

But the trade secrets behind the super-refined aviation lubricants with their special additives, from OORPPBC was reputed to be a long-handed-down, family secret - even more secret than the recipe for Coca-Cola.

It was this total secrecy that kept OORPPBC at the forefront of lubrication product technology, and which made their products highly sought-after worldwide - even to the extent of NASA putting in orders for the OORPPBC Lunar Orbiter grease.

 

Naturally, thanks to OOPPPBC's secrecy, it wasn't even widely known that OORPPBC produced lubricant products designed for outer space - but when this knowledge was disseminated during hushed conversations in the likes of aviation halls of fame, it was soon realised that here was a product that was out of this world, and one which would be.........

 

Edited by onetrack
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.......capable of making profits to rival Gina's Iron Ore which after all was only dirt.

Sadly it was a failure; it was capable of keeping recreational aircraft engines going forever, but the easily spooked pilots couldn't handle the side effects, which were a loud barking note from the exhaust, and a sound like a Turbo blow off valve going off when WOT was selected. So OT called in Turbine Consulting and the result was GAS. Soon 18 yos were putting gas in their Mustangs and Audis to getr the sprting bark and turbo blow off sound at each gear change. Turbo changed the company name from OOPPBC to HOOTERS, and the money poured in from the East, where .......

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2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo changed the company name from OOPPBC to HOOTERS, and the money poured in from the East, where .......

...... the kiddies had been locked down for years and they just wanted to drive ........... anywhere.

 

The name HOOTERS was also a great attractant as there had been no back-seat action anywhere in Mextoria because Dan had banned that so as to reduce the spread of the Rona ....... and the citizenry had, of course, obeyed like all good Mextorians do.

 

The lockdowns and the lack of back-seat action had continued for so long that pubescent boys were walking the streets of Melbournistan looking at young ladies and wondering where they had got such huge muscled chests.

 

The dangers from this were recognized by the Victorian Health Department where the CHO, Sutto, held another Press Conference (to which he is addicted and is getting treatment), to express his concerns that the population growth in Mextoria is likely to drop at an alarming rate because (a) People are buggering off in droves to other states and (b) All of these lockdown-effected young pubescent men don't know where to put it.

 

"I know" said Dan "We will get Turbine Sex Education and Prophylactics Pty Ltd to teach all Victorians how to use "it" effectively and do to each other what I have been doing to the Vicmanistan economy, plus the great Turbo himself can show them the wonders of .......... 

Edited by Captain
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.....new technology to make the State run since 90% of them don't do anything. In fact Victoria had reached the point where the only people doing anything were industrious RAA pilots building new kitplanes [averef] and this led to the brilliant idea of ............

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9 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.....new technology to make the State run since 90% of them don't do anything. In fact Victoria had reached the point where the only people doing anything were industrious RAA pilots building new kitplanes [averef] and this led to the brilliant idea of ............

...... making every Mextorian a member of the AUF, which has the added benefit of ......

Edited by Captain
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...reviving the AUF, an exciting prospect which is expected to produce a new wave of aircraft designers who build their own designs rather than just talk about it. Already a small steering committee has been formed, and is making plans for a National Fly In to be called NatureFly. This name has been chosen to show the public the genuine interest of pilots in the environment, since they are regularly cultivating it in forced landings, watering it, and keeping CO2 emissions to a minimum by eating low-gas food.

We won't be seeing the ban on camping under the wing which killed the last lot of National Fly Ins; there will be a variety of under-wing activities as there was in the past when ...............

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29 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

...reviving the AUF, an exciting prospect which is expected to produce a new wave of aircraft designers who build their own designs rather than just talk about it. Already a small steering committee has been formed, and is making plans for a National Fly In to be called NatureFly. This name has been chosen to show the public the genuine interest of pilots in the environment, since they are regularly cultivating it in forced landings, watering it, and keeping CO2 emissions to a minimum by eating low-gas food.

We won't be seeing the ban on camping under the wing which killed the last lot of National Fly Ins; there will be a variety of under-wing activities as there was in the past when ...............

..... many future AUF members were conceived (It is amazing what can be achieved in a one-man tent, or a two-man tent (NTTIAWWT) although one of the two men probably needed to be a woman to achieve the desired AUF membership growth)..

 

This new round of Fly-Ins were kicked off by one at Botanic-Ridge known as Bot-Fly, another up in the Riverland to be called Fruit-Fly, and one up at ......

Edited by Captain
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4 hours ago, Captain said:

..... many future AUF members were conceived (It is amazing what can be achieved in a one-man tent, or a two-man tent (NTTIAWWT) although one of the two men probably needed to be a woman to achieve the desired AUF membership growth)..

 

This new round of Fly-Ins were kicked off by one at Botanic-Ridge known as Bot-Fly, another up in the Riverland to be called Fruit-Fly, and one up at ......

.....Evans Head called Blow-Fly, but ................

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... the one that wasn't looked forward to quite as much, was the one in Darwin called Sand-Fly. However, as with all the Fly-Ins, there were hard cases at every event. By far the leading hardcase was a flier known as "Colonel" R. Cook (with the Colonel being an honorary title, and the "R" reportedly standing for "Ratbag") - a gent known for his total dislike of any aviation rules, regulations, and formal training procedures.

To say he was an aviation outlaw was an understatement. He made the Wild West look tame. But when he arrived at the Darwin SandFly in a ragged-looking Thruster, covered in oil leak stains, and with wing skins flapping like........

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....the National flag, a couple of the members put in a call to CASA and requested a ramp check, just as they used to do at the Natfly meetings. CASA sent FOI "Nobby" Butler who .........................

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35 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....the National flag, a couple of the members put in a call to CASA and requested a ramp check, just as they used to do at the Natfly meetings. CASA sent FOI "Nobby" Butler who .........................

.... had a nickname that was 100% obvious when he wore his CASA regulation "Warwick Capper" kaki shorts.

 

"Nobby", being there for ramp checks worried all AUF members as he made the men nervous and the women infatuated, so they .......

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.........all made rapid departures, some downwind some crosswind, most with only the fuel they landed with. After they'd gone there was just a sea of camping equipment in little piles and a carpet of Darwin stubbies, and Nobby .......................

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8 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.........all made rapid departures, some downwind some crosswind, most with only the fuel they landed with. After they'd gone there was just a sea of camping equipment in little piles and a carpet of Darwin stubbies, and Nobby .......................

..... was disappointed that he didn't get the chance to flash his .......

 

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....belt badge which had been styled in the FBI design. All he needed now was a 359 Magnum, he thought trying to figure out how many of the fleeing rats he could have brought down. That this would not exactly fit the safety mantra of CASA escaped him for the moment and ....

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15 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....belt badge which had been styled in the FBI design. All he needed now was a 359 Magnum, he thought trying to figure out how many of the fleeing rats he could have brought down. That this would not exactly fit the safety mantra of CASA escaped him for the moment and ....

..... beside, many of the AUF ladies where discussing something about Nobby's "Magnum" during an AUF XXX Forum on the Dark Web ......... but perhaps they were just talking about ice-creams, although one did mention his ........

 

Previous discussion groups on the AUF XXX Forum were - "Debbie Does Thrusters", "bull entertains the entire Bone CWA (with closeups)" and the more serious but equally pornographic "The effects of Castrol R on the Male and Female Libidos".

Edited by Captain
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.......serious implications because it appears he may not have been double vaxxed, since Cyprus doesn't believe in it preferring the application of the manure of the Cyprus Quakka...................

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4 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......serious implications because it appears he may not have been double vaxxed, since Cyprus doesn't believe in it preferring the application of the manure of the Cyprus Quakka...................

..... however Nobby is said to be well known for "double vaxing" (or in some cases even more times on a good night) a few prime AUF & CWA ..... 

Edited by Captain
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2 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........who could forget those famous AUF names such as, .. or .. or.. or even ...

... but then again ....

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35 minutes ago, Captain said:

Previous discussion groups on the AUF XXX Forum were - "Debbie Does Thrusters", "bull entertains the entire Bone CWA (with closeups)" and the more serious but equally pornographic "The effects of Castrol R on the Male and Female Libidos".

AS AN ASIDE, ...... while the latter video is now quite old, it is culturally and historically relevant & important, as a young Turbo makes a brief appearance and frightens the girls at about 7 mins and 23 seconds into the video.

Edited by Captain
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