Captain
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Everything posted by Captain
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.... which made Alaine's previous purchases of Turbine Alternative Currency's (TAC's) "TurdCoin" look a bit shabby. But when Don announced that the US Treasury would be keeping all of the Mexican cartel's ill-gotten TurdCoin in Fort Knox, TAC experienced a demand that ..... TurdCoin looks similar to this, but with a T ............. and more brown.
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Just look at that picture again. bull has those same "come-to-bed" eyes, too.
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While the above painting of Frank makes him look a bit regal, on the other hand, Harry was just a swashbuckling pisspot. But his facial features, broad shoulders and 6-pack are the spit of bull's.
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.... that, plus some old press statements, was the basis for proving OT's involvement in minting. As a result of a short Court case (not Margaret Court, who is pretty tall), OT has been proven to be the beneficial owner of the Perth Mint, plus, through a family trust he also operates the Perth Mint Farm where he grows Mentha Arvensis, after he lost the plant rights case to further disguise his ownership by trying to name the genus "Mentha Goldoon-de-Onesis. The minting of the 1337 Goldoon in East Perth was a shock to Sir Francis Drake and Captain Morgan (Frank and Harry could have just sailed up the Swan River without firing a shot ..... [but they hadn't been born yet]) and was therefore an interesting time in WA history, when ...... Frank Drake was really peed-off when he found out that the Sand Monkeys had been minting coins for the Spanish, and Goldoons no less.
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.... into a gay bar in Holland (NTTIAWWT). But that was only because ......
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...... Because it was soon evident to most sandgropers that there had been excess groping and Sanguin's state-wide Family Tree was really a sickly stunted bush, and his calculations for WA's unique case, showed that many "branches" had cross pollinated , meaning that they had been very, very "friendly" with their own "flowers" (or "grand-flowers"), many of whom had been begat'd by their own ......
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.... get "it" out and lay it on the table in front of the CoCs. This was a BIG ask, as OT is a typical, buff, masculine Western Australian man-of-the-desert ............... who has been affected, adversely, by the normal yet extreme extent of the in-breeding that has been happening in the West since the Batavia was a tree. The magnitude of the consanguinity in WA makes Tasmania look like an unfettered gene pool, but it also .....
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..... Convention of Concubines (the CoC's), where, by unanimous motion, OT was required to .....
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..... the silk road should revert to an unmade track, similar to what they were when OT used to ride his pushy from Southern Cross to Bordertown each week, in search of gold with his mate Harry Lasseter, and to pick up the mail. Genghis respected OT's ideas and academic qualifications, plus Genghis just like OT as a good bloke, so he ...... Onesie on the way to get his letters
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Now THAT is funny.
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..... the temperature hit 48 C, in the shade, and the new bitum trike wings .....
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..... revolved around the management of the Silk Road. Genghis (or Genny to his mates) summarized it well when he said "The Silk Road works a treat when the camels are using it, but the repairs to the fabric are massive when horses and elephants tear it up. I have, therefore, today issued an Executive Order that only dromedaries and blokes in bare feet can use it until I have a chat with Lex, who might be persuaded to kick-the-can now that he is a bit flush, and we jointly decide what to do about the .......
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..... and this is when Lex (who everyone liked) went from just being Alexander the Great, to Alexander the Moderately Wealth and Comfortably Well Off (AtMW&CWO), which meant that Genghis has a problem on his hands, that .....
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..... Alexander the Great just franchised a City Sushi joint down the road and .....
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..... the meat portions are pussy's nuts and I took the fillings out of many of the enemies that you slaughtered, mate. I kept the gold ones and put the amalgam in the food for texture." Genghis was a tough killer, a ruthless ruler, but also a cool dude, so he ......
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..... buying more shares when he announced that the male offcuts were being marketed as the key components in a Special Short Soup under the Lee Won Turbin brand of convenience foods. Turdy was proud of his ancestor, Lee Won Turbin, who had fought with Genghis Khan and had won praise for his ......
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..... he stopped needing to use tennis court line markers to spray white paint down the centreline of his black cats, so that .....
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..... rank, but Turbs always turned this to his advantage, as every time he would sneak one out in the Food Court at the Moorabbin Westfield Mall, everyone would say "Oh, it's just that remnant skunk odor again". As an extension, that is why many of Turdy's controversial opinions on this site are considered, by the RAA Officianatti, the WF Moderatti & other various technical luminaries, to be "on the nose". But Turdo is made of stronger stuff and his Skunk Farm endeavors are now starting to .....
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..... when he announced that his address was 203 William St, in Gettysburg Heights, and while that was a cul-de-sac, it was still ......
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Turbo, yes that is actually him in the below photo, has the perfect craggy face and weary, bloodshot, weeping, unfeeling eyes to play a great Abe Lincoln. (This follows on from his critical success when he played a preggers Mary in the Moorabbin Primary School Nativity Play, mid last century). The crowd shown at right are a lineup waiting to get into Turbo's Moorabbin Cat House.
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..... the cannons fired and Turbo, impersonating Abe Lincoln (pre assassination, not post), added what became famously known as "The Moorabbin Post-Script" when he came up with .....
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..... a Sulphur crested (and by that, I mean a very healthy Cacatua Galerita), one of Clarry Carnaby’s Black Cockatoos (but only of the Calyptorhynchus Latirostris genus), a Major Mitchell’s Cockatoo (Berti Mitchell fought beside Turbs and Cappy up the Khyber and he named his bird Lophochroa Leadbeateri after Wally Leadbeater who went missing after the 2nd attack), and those nasty little Nymphicus Hollandicus Cockatiels that were named after those Dutch nymphos at the Moorabbin Cat House. Even now, Turbo's digital keyboard-based screech in the Wreck Flying Forums, is like fingernails down a blackboard and brings .......
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.... Frankston where he first met Turbo when Turds was a cockatoo for the Bookie. "I thought I was going to work in a library" commented Turbo when he met Dave for the first time, but now I .....
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... and while Emus and Ostriches have never seen a prawn, although they are certainly a bit partial to freshwater shrimp (hence that controversial and little-known verse of Waltzing Matilda that was removed by the colonial authorities in the late 1800's and is now rolled up and hidden away in a dark damp corner in Canberra, somewhat akin to the Dead Sea Scrolls). However, it is a Davey Attenburrow approved factoid that the reason that the Moa went extinct in NZ is that they developed a penchant for prawns and whitebait, which meant that their ........
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..... but then realised that it was a waste of time. So instead of going down the Cokebottle route, which is also a VB route at times, Turbo had an egg-shaped brainwave. He would use his Turbine Genetics Corp to transfer Emu, Ostrich and Moa DNA into the Aussie chook flock. He'd need larger egg cartons, of course, but he would make a fortune, ...... however he also noticed the horrified looks on the faces of his bantams at Turbine Googies and Roasted Worn-out Chooks PLC, and he realised that he had a pressing need to develop a mechanism for enlarging the chooks orifices before the 1st of the CHEMU (registered name by Turbine Marketing) eggs came down the chute. In his usual efficient manner Turdy solved this issue by .......
