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The Never Ending Story


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.....nas will be full of people singing the jingle durig football matches and ...........................     [Turbo respectfully points out that "First Nations" is the name of the grou

........ had been misquoted by Turbo bin Plonker, as it was actually "الله أكبر" that he ried as he climbed awat.   This post by Turbo Garbage-Bin had attracted the attention of VicPol and d

...... bull wouldn't have pointed to 11 oclock once Mave sidled provocatively into the room.   This was a record for bull as over the last decade or so he has had trouble showing the time ov

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7 hours ago, turboplanner said:

......the The Turkish White Wolf that focused on doomed soldiers and airman with............

.......... the intensity of a CWA member who had been without a spouse for a couple of years.

 

"Wow, that's dangerous" said Starlight "But I reckon that a Turkish White Wolf (a TWW) would be harder to manage".

 

"Don't you believe it" said Mable who had spent 5 dry years after Turbo found an alternative to his regular visits "As when we CWA ladies hunt as a pack, we are more organized and ..............

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"resourceful. How else do you think we could travel back in time 106 years then catch a bus to Gallipoli, walk through the Turkish lines and come across you for such a little result Starlight" and added "not to mention hiding here under the bushes so we don't appear in any Australian records. Picking up a rifle from the battlefield and walking off the Captain yelled over his shoulder "I'd rather take on the Turks!", but a Turkish......

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45 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

the Captain yelled over his shoulder "I'd rather take on the Turks!", but a Turkish......

.......... lady from their equivalent of the Dardanelles Rissole & Bowling Club called out "Hey, big boy" (she actually called "Hey büyük boHey büyük çocuk" with a rather saucy lilt), to which Starlight responded with a jaunty ...........

 

THIS IS THE VERY LADY THAT CALLED TO STARLIGHT. (You can

see the satisfied smirk and the other aftereffects of their liaison).

Image result for Turkish peasant lady

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....... with a gestic that indicated that he should get his gun out.

 

Starlight was embarrassed ................................... at first ..................................... then decided that she was worth it and even if his was just a .22 (a sad trait of the Turkish Turbine family, which makes you wonder how there are so many of them), so he proceeded to ...........

Edited by Captain
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.... go looking for some underground mutton to make up an attractive meal for two. After all, a good start to any serious relationship with the opposite sex, is to ensure you feed them a good meal at the first meet-up, and then show them your......

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.ears        as the white things had eaten quite a bit off the top of them,after a very good shower he was ready. now................

 

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........lighter and wiser, but still a man, Captain Starlight walked out to the SE5, packed it's radiator with chewing gum, found a Turkish bomb dump and roped half a dozen to the grab handle, swung on the prop, ran after the aircraft as it started rolling, jumped in and took off narrowly missing a pommy canteen.

 

He felt the air flowing trough his teeth, and then oted with concern it was also comeing ot his ears, but he focussed as his Officers had taught him on the Khyber Pass, and soon had some targets to ......

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2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

and soon had some targets to ......

........ check the nationality of.

 

"Look bro" the kiwis said "Thut Aussie is coming back for another go at us and ut looks like he has another sex bombs."

 

"Thut's a wee problem" sud the Kiwi Officer who was a Maori chaap with a face tattoo (another culturally correct reference in the new woke NES) and who, before the war, used to overdub the narratives un the Mainlaand Cheese commercials.

 

"Uf he's an Aussie he's a duck head and obviously as thuck as 2 planks" saaad the Kiwi Officer "Aas his prop is half shot off because TinkyWunk had forgotten thut part of hus story from hus earlier post (he must be a double duck head), so pass me the NZ army's one and only machine gun, plus all chup in to give me sex bullets, and I'll ............

 

THE KIWI OFFICER WUTH HIS PET BIRD TO EAT ALL THE WHITE

WRIGLY THINGS UN THE SHUTTER'S DITCH.

Image result for maori warrior images

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On 05/11/2020 at 8:35 AM, Captain said:

THIS IS THE VERY LADY THAT CALLED TO STARLIGHT. (You can

see the satisfied smirk and the other aftereffects of their liaison).

Image result for Turkish peasant lady

"Is that John Gorton in drag?" asked Heidi.

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50 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

And so began the legend of Tin Pack pass, srtarting with ...................

......... the thousands of NES contributors all PMing each other and asking "WTF is Turbo referring to and how do we srtart the next phase of the vitally important NES (which underpins the entire premise of the Wreck Flying website [so Eeeen owes us a lot ... just say'n]).

 

bull, who is the brightest and bravest of the NES bunch said "even though my caps key is stuffed, i'll have a crack at interpreting tink's last post as i reckon he is meaning to send the nes in the direction of ........... 

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........Shrapnel Gully. It was so obvious that Turbo sometimes wondered if this was really the crack team on WF or not.

 

This of course was being held by the Aussies today, and they had just finished cleaning out the trenches, getting the last of the spent Turkish cartridge shells off the floor so they didn't trip over them. The Aussies had counted the cartridges and realised the Turks had about ten times the ammunition (but offsetting that were notoriously bad shots. Breaker Morant had bared his bum at the Turkish line only two days ago, and although bullets pinged around his rear all afternoon, he eventually had to come in because his bum was becoming frostbitten.

 

It was at this bunch of disaffected Aussies that the myopic Captain Starlight aimed the SE5. This was not twinty sex half starved Kiwis, this was the pride of the King's (and Robert Menzie's) Own, and they soon showed their ....................

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...... problems with history's quirkiness, as Little Bobby Menzies was just a nipper still studying for admission to the bar in 1915, and the Gallipoli peninsula was a Hilton Resort when Menzies was PM.

 

So, dear Turdboy, it was 1915 and they soon showed their ........

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.......disdain with Captain Starlights handling of the SE5, which had developed another radiator leak, by throwing rocks at it. One  caught it right in the venturi, and the engine coughed and died, the SE5 droppipng like a rock into the Turkish trenches. The impact set off the bombs and wiped out a Turkish trench line. Cappy, bruised and dirty staggered over to the Australian trench, but was heaved by the Aussies into the New Zealand trench, and pushed in with the Pollies. Many people commented that that was where he belonged, but Cappy.............

 

 

[Turbo was just checking whether Cappy was "on message" and also trying to keep the NES in line with the logic on some of the other WF threads]

 

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..... fortunately, was made of sterner stuff, and promptly started doing a Haka to the Kiwis, which confused them no end, as they'd never got their own back (apart from when they pixxed into the wind), and it wasn't long before they realised Cappy was actually an Aussie (it was the nasal accent that gave him away), and the Kiwis promptly growled and advanced as one on Cappy, just as he .....

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...... got out some gum leaves on a piece of bark to initiate a Smoking Ceremony, gave them a Welcome to Country speech & then played the Didge.

 

This disturbed & confused the Kiwis and made them reevaluate their .......

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.....morals, cracked speech, and the very reasons for living in the Land of the Long White Cloud, and they realised they had been conned into living there by the Colonial British.

 

"Never mind about the Turks, we should be fighting the Bretesh" said General Bartholomew Rukiwiki Johnson-Smythe and to Cappy's amazement gave the order to wheel 180 degrees and head for the beach where the Poms had been playing cricket and watching the Aussies and New Zealanders doing all the work. his jaw really dropped when ........

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