ahlocks Posted October 23, 2009 Share Posted October 23, 2009 searching for a legal way to turn Ruddy and Julia into carbon as a way of saying thanks for a new tax....:dog: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkSarcasm Posted October 23, 2009 Share Posted October 23, 2009 searching for a legal way to turn Ruddy and Julia into carbon as a way of saying thanks for a new tax....:dog: The rest of the gang agreed that they couldn't think of anyone who would be disappointed if Ahlo succeeded... They thought hard. 'Maybe we can use our Subrolla to do it?' suggested Darky. 'We might even win the Nobel Peace Prize in the process (after all, it clearly isn't that difficult)'... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted October 23, 2009 Share Posted October 23, 2009 ....So they disconnected the 735 anti-pollution devices which had been added year after year by mindless governments, and, using a length of No 8 wire, attached a carbon producer Turbo had found in a NSW Museum (most of NSW seems to be a museum). When they threw the switch, the subrolla sucked in carbon and then carbonated the surrounding water, and they began sending bills for the carbon cleanup to krudd. "This would even be nice to drink if it wasn't for the salt", said Ahlo, who'd drink anything..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted October 23, 2009 Share Posted October 23, 2009 ...."This would even be nice to drink if it wasn't for the salt", said Ahlo, who'd drink anything..... "Hmmm, chateaux five minutes ago... what a lovely vintage." notioned Ahloh in his best plonk snob manner. "OK, pass the shot gun over here Tubz and I'll hold it on you while you try some..." ============== Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted October 26, 2009 Share Posted October 26, 2009 "......carbonated grape juice" "Isn't it funny how nobody drinks champagne in Australia any more" said Turbo "We all semm to have gone off it. "Maybe we could add some guarana to our brew, use the subrolla to carbonate it, and then power the subrolla and the assorted Jabs, Stars, Savs, Wings, and so on, thereby avoiding the 300% excise markup which the Government uses to pay for ASIC card inspectors and junkets to Europe" There was no response from Darky who was out belting wheels out of shape and reading multiple law books, although she had already realised the key thing in law was to find out how much money the sucker (sorry, Client) had then explain that they might not win the case but the long way round was the way to go - a close parallel to some Indian Taxi drivers. "Never forget why you became a lawyer" her lecturer had said "Japanese cars are expensive" The Japanese group giggled in the background "We got them in the end" said Nob. Ahlo started to laugh, but the cursed as he realised he had forgotten the rivet count at 7332...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomo Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 7333..... ============ Cough, cough...splutter, splutter as Ditdot blow's the dust off the Neeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrr Ennnnnnnnnnddddddddddiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnggggggggggg Sttttttttooooooooorrrrrrrrrryyyyyyy:crying: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkSarcasm Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 Meanwhile, as Ahlo restarted his rivet count, Darky moved from breaking wheels to breaking headsets... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomo Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 ....At least your getting consistent!?.................:ah_oh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkSarcasm Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 Darky mused on the delights (or lack thereof) of being 'consistently destructive' and then realised it was a good thing she wasn't alone on this Subrolla, otherwise it would've been sunk ages ago. Darky then realised that, apart from her and (the newly 18) DitDot, the Subrolla (and the NES recently) was strangely empty. Had the rest of the crew been kidnapped or were they simply sunbaking up on deck??... Tune in next week for the next exciting instalment of The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy! Oh, wait... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 "7334, 7335... gumble grumble grumble...." muttered Ahloh. :dog: "First the politically correct gag poor Planey. :Disappointed: Then the Rat goes and does a 'disappearedPete'. Darker's headset goes tit's up (oops! is that sort of expression allowed??) and now I find out that I can't go north and have a beer with the birthday boy ....'cuz he doesn't like the stuff!!!" :scratch head: Besides... it's too bloody hot to have a 'puter on the lap here tonight.....:yuk: ================== Belated happy birthday ditdah!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, Turbo was sunbaking in Alaska............... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomo Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 Whhaaaaaaaat are you doing in Alaska? having a sun baking of a relaxing time:cool_shades: while Ratatatat has disapeared into the Waggax2's thin air:nerd:, bigpete has totally vanished:crying: Ditdot and darky are the only ones controlling the subrolla... or so it seems? Ahlo is getting hot legs from his laptop...:ah_oh: AND PLANEY... has gone, and taken the aviation terms with im! ============ Tankee a loot Ahchooo...eerrr...? Ahlocks:hug: Darky has changed her Avitarphotography.... and it makes me wonder..? Fancy car, flying, Lawer, and now she go's and gets one of those hats...:cool_shades: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 ... Darky moved from breaking wheels to breaking headsets... "It's that bruddy hat" suggested Nobu. :rolleyes1: "Interfere with earcup cause crick crick noises..... just like Dika's knees during morning walk around subrolla deck." Darkster pouted and protested. "But it's a top hat...." :cool_shades: ============== They seek him here, they seek him there. The Rat's racked off to who knows where... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkSarcasm Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 Darky has changed her Avitarphotography.... and it makes me wonder..? Fancy car, flying, Lawer, and now she go's and gets one of those hats...:cool_shades: What do you wonder young Tomo, I'm curious :confused: They seek him here, they seek him there. The Rat's racked off to who knows where... The Scarlet Rat? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 The Scarlet Rat? Mysteries of the The Bermuda Ratangle? =============== ..puttin' on my top hat...(just how do you sing in text???) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomo Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 What do you wonder young Tomo, I'm curious :confused: Me too! can't remember now what I was wondering............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkSarcasm Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Me too! can't remember now what I was wondering............ Only 18 and already young Ditdah's memory is going...:stirring pot: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Maybe she was about to go break dancing.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Maybe she was about to go break dancing.... Groan..... (actually it's pretty good.... ...Took a while to get it though ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomo Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Only 18 and already young Ditdah's memory is going... Yeah, sad really isn't it?! though I think I've got an excuse... I've done a lot over the last few days.... including nearly 400klm of driving since 12.30pm today:keen: I think it was something to do with the Mafia...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Then the Rat goes and does a 'disappearedPete'. Turbo has obtained information that the Rat had flown to Hollywood to audition for the part in a story about the life and times of Wiley Coyote. "Lose the beard!" they said the first day, and the Rat had dropped into a barber shop, because he didn't know how to shave himself. On the second day the Producer said "You could never play Wiley with a tight little mouth like that downturned at the edges" The Director was more kind hearted, and besides they hadn't been able to get a suitable actor to this point for obvious reasons. "Give us a smile" he said, but this was more that El Ratto was prepared to do just for a movie role, so they parted ways. "He was SOOOO scrawny" said the producer after they left. El Ratto was now in a run down saloon in Tijuana slurping Tequila. His eyeballs were like dogballs, and he was badly in need of rescuing...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Turbo has obtained information that the Rat had flown to Hollywood to audition for the part in a story about the life and times of Wiley Coyote. "Lose the beard!" they said the first day, and the Rat had dropped into a barber shop, because he didn't know how to shave himself. On the second day the Producer said "You could never play Wiley with a tight little mouth like that downturned at the edges" The Director was more kind hearted, and besides they hadn't been able to get a suitable actor to this point for obvious reasons. "Give us a smile" he said, but this was more that El Ratto was prepared to do just for a movie role, so they parted ways. "He was SOOOO scrawny" said the producer after they left. El Ratto was now in a run down saloon in Tijuana slurping Tequila. His eyeballs were like dogballs, and he was badly in need of rescuing...... .......... "Nooooooooooo" said the Rat to the NSW Firey's Rescue Team (who were still trying to open the gate behind the saloon). "I don't want to be rescued, as some of these mexican maidens are darlings. Just let me die in peace .... and in the nicest possible way (just like Billy S)." "Si senior" said a beautiful Mexican lady with one of the black doileys on her head, and not wearing much else "And I can assure you gringoes that El Ratto the Magnifico is not 'scrawny', as since when can 6' 6", 110 kgs, 3' 3" across the shoulders, a moosh full of gold fangs and 35 years old in the prime of his life, be called scrawny? I call it ........................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Decca Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 ..............a mistravesty of justice, or should that be a travesty of misjustice? Help, Darky, legal terminology guidance needed here! Fact is one would have to be scrawny to be considered for that role in the first place. Can’t say I blame ElRatto for being attracted to the saloon though, not to mention the beautiful maidens, who could only be attracted to this beautiful creature (according to the mirror) by the heavy metal (worth how much/ounce?) in his mouth and the fact that he wanted to die in a tiny Mexican town called Peace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted November 5, 2009 Share Posted November 5, 2009 …..as Deccadence puts a “legal” line on Darky – you have to admire his skills. Just imagine the terror he was in the days when he wore gold braid, twitched the moustache and spoke flying jargon to the hosties! Tijuana is one of the most colourful cities in the world at night, with just about every street having different coloured street lights. This appears to be more related to buying old US street lights, but it does create a carnival atmosphere, blended with the thick smoke haze from hundreds of thousands of wood fires, and it was in this atmosphere that the rat was showing off his gold tooth. Being an environmentalist, and half full of booze, he raised the question of the major gas fire off the WA coast, and how long it took to plug the massive leak, suggesting that the world needed another Red Adair. “Gonzales is better than Red Adair” said Pedro who had been explaining Mexico’s tax laws to a very interested Rat., and he went on to tell this story about a fire in a West Texas oil well. The Drill Manager phoned Red Adair, who quoted 14 million dollars to put out the fire. “Jesus” said the Texan, scratching his head, “we can’t pay that – forget it” His partner said he’d heard of a Mexican called Gonzales, so they found his phone number and called him up. “Two thousand dollars Senor: said Gonzales “Done” said the Texan – when can you come?” “We leaving now Senor” said Gonzales Soon the Texans see a little cloud of dust coming from the south, and it gets bigger and bigger until it transforms into the shape of an old 1953 Chevy Stakeside ute with seven or eight Mexicans standing in the back, their sombreros flapping in the breeze. The Chevy comes charging in and Gonzales slams on the brakes and skids straight over the top of the blazing well. There’s Mexicans hopping, screaming and jumping in all directions, but the fire goes out. “OK”, said the Texan, “It’s a bit unorthodox, but here’s your two thousand dollars” As he surveyed the miserable band of Mexicans with trouser legs burnt off he said, “If you don’t mind me asking, what are you going to do with this money?” “Well Senor” said Gonzales, “first we’ll get a brake reline for the old Chevy!” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomo Posted November 5, 2009 Share Posted November 5, 2009 .......... fit a fangle dangle doovy into me eroprane............ get me mrs some new flowers for the kitchen table .... :star:............ get a mekanic in to fix up the oil leak on me wife's push mower, and a new battery for my ride on wouldn't go astray either.... save me the trouble of having to pull start it all the time:chuffed: ........ Oh really? says.................. ============ Darky has sold her mind on ebay....! no wonder she can't land the jabiruter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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